In response to my last post on Understanding the Loneliness of Church Leaders, a few people asked me how they might help.
Here are my encouragements in brief.
- Pray for your leaders. Really. Pray for them. Text them and ask them how you can pray for them that week. And then pray. Specifically, pray for their families to be encouraged and nurtured by the church. A lot of times families can feel like they are being watched all the time. That when they speak, their words are being scrutinized and weighed as church policy. Pray for them especially on Saturday. Inevitably, I hear from pastors who feel an acute sense of spiritual attack the day before Sunday. Accusations from the Enemy: “What you’re doing doesn’t matter.” “They don’t appreciate you.” “They don’t need you.” “You are alone.” Pray that they would be sustained and feel loved and wrapped in the arms of grace.
- Ask them how they’re doing. Believe it or not, many leaders in the church are never asked how they’re doing. And if they are, they are not sure if the person will weaponize their response of “It’s been a hard week” as being “Church folks are being difficult.”
- Reach out to wife and kids. So much emphasis can be placed on the leader, the family is put in the shadow. Countless pastors tell me that no one reaches out to their wives unless they need something. No one reaches out to their kids. Change this tendency by simply reaching out to see how they are doing.
- Come up with 2-3 ideas of how you could use your gifting and what you are excited about to help start or promote ministries. Instead of waiting to be told, assume that God has placed you in that congregation to sound a call for a particular ministry.
- Donate 2-3 hours of serving in the office each week. While ministry has an organic element to it, there are still spreadsheets that need to be organized, emails to be sent, phone calls to be made. But it’s not a matter of serving sporadically…if someone can consistently volunteer 2-3 hours each week, they will begin to feel ownership themselves of the ministry and feel fulfilled in moving forward together.
- Offer to watch their kids so they can go on a date night…without being paid. I know too many church leaders who are sheepish about asking for help. They know all the other weights people are carrying and they don’t want to add to the burden by asking for help. They need it. Don’t wait for them to ask.
- Write a letter simply saying what you appreciate about them. It could be one paragraph! Specifically, how do they reflect the character of Christ? How have you been encouraged by their life?
I’m glad people want to help. Hopefully, these are seven ways that you can be empowered to move toward the vulnerable.